Often times a priest can be found who will participate in this type of wedding in a non-church setting. In most cases, there is some flexibility but in the case of WDW and Las Vegas actual rules have been established.
I don't know about one at Mohonk, but I'd bet that it is similar in the eyes of the church. It's a destination, albeit a spiritual, secular one. The incentive for me is not my attraction to the place, but Emily's. It is only the place that she has dreamt about since she was a little girl. That is some tradition and motive, and I really want her to be happy. So, with the extent of my expectations combined with my conservative upbringing, I have a crisis.
The solution just may be to have a small Catholic ceremony followed by the real one at the destination. I hope this does not relegate the second one to second-best, and that will be a struggle. At this juncture, though, I can't find an alternative that will please everyone, or anyone.
Because of logistics, we're having two weddings. Our parents will be the only witnesses at the first one; the second will be more like a traditional wedding, with a big guest list and a reception. I'm afraid people won't show up for the second one if they find out it's not a "real" wedding, but my fiancé's mom and dad are really pushing for us to go public with the news. What should we do?
While you shouldn't mislead your guests, you also aren't compelled to take out a full-page ad in your local paper. Your in-laws can tell whomever they like; you don't have to make a peep (but if somebody calls to get the whole story, you'd better come clean).
To ensure that everyone who attends the large celebration knows what lies in store, word the invitation as a vow renewal. (Your stationer or an etiquette book will have examples.) And don't worry—friends and family are sure to understand the circumstances and will be glad to celebrate with you whenever they're invited.
So, bring on the double wedding. Twice the fun!